I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
