ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
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i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
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You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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