she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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