so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
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