it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize