so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
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She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
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New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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