I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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