Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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