Plan B is the new Plan A
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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