I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
