Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
