We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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