You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Randomize
