How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
