She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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