Whod you bang
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize