she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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