dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
