I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
