Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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