i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Randomize