yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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