id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
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