Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Randomize
