I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
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