we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Ladies don't puke and tell
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
