LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
