drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
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He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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