That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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