Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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