He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
You did what with his pubic hair?
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