dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
we're chasing vodka with high fives
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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