How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize