so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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