You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize