I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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