so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I wish i was in the wii world.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
