I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
