I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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