All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
