I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
that's an acceptable place to lick
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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