My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
