you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
