I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I think i peed on brittanys purse
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
You're a waste of cheezeits
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
