I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Randomize
