I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Randomize