and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
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