David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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