Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize