No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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