Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
